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TigerChamp

If I was Eclipse....

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If I was Eclipse, I would demand that the local peasants bring forth a virgin snackrifice once every full moon to appease me.

 

#IfIwasEclipse

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If I was Eclipse, I would order teens from every country to come together once as year and fight to the death in a battle royale in my honour.

 

#IfIwasEclipse

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If I was Eclipse I'd be taking up my rightful place on Mount Olympus, riding pimped out chariots and banging Athena while stacking drachma to the ceiling 

Edited by crangs
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If I was Eclipse, I would walk into bjjnoobs diner, order my meal and NOT TIP HIM A GODDAMN CENT

 

#IfIwasEclipse

actually id do that even if i wasnt eclipse 

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If I was Eclipse, I would walk into bjjnoobs diner, order my meal and NOT TIP HIM A GODDAMN CENT

 

#IfIwasEclipse

 

actually id do that even if i wasnt eclipse 

If I was Eclipse I'd walk into BjjNoob's restaurant and he'd tip me when I finished my meal

Edited by crangs
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If I was Eclipse, I would let Donald Cerrone grab my woman's butt, just so I could rip out his spine like I was Sub Zero from Mortal Kombat.

 

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If I was Eclipse, I would take over a third world country.... like Tanzania by just showing up and announcing that I was in charge. Nobody would bother to say anything, and I would declare myself King of all of the land. Then promptly import women from Sweden, like any sane man would.

 

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If I was Eclipse, I would try to get bant by JChristian. Then when he did it, I would step on the internet, making it totally useless for all.

 

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If I was Eclipse I would start every day with a fresh squeezed glass of whoopass and a walk round the block with my pet Chuck Norris

 

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If i was Eclipse i'd show 'Murica' the guns and they would instantly be the next province of the New Great Canada with Mexico not far behind

 

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If I was Eclipse, I would force Obama to give me a new state. Not one anywhere near here either. I'd take over some island in Malaysia, just to be a ****.

 

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If I was Eclipse I would walk around with a hawk perched on my enormous forearms to bring down passing animals to blend into my protein shakes

 

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If I was Eclipse, I would have killed everyone involved in the making of Sharknado 2. Sharknado 1 was more than enough. 

  

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If I was Eclipse, I would declare Canada my pet country. I'd tell them when to speak. Reward them with poutine. Then force them to be quiet the rest of the time.

 

What the **** are they gonna do about it... Offer me an unlimited supply of maple syrup, that I quickly snatch from their sickly palms? 

  

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If I was eclipse i'd make all athletic commissions overturn Diego Sanchez's robberies, cut him from the ufc, make him move back up to welterweight and fight Palhares

 

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If I was eclipse i'd make all athletic commissions overturn Diego Sanchez's robberies, cut him from the ufc, make him move back up to welterweight and fight Palhares

 

#IfIwasEclipse

Best one yet.

 

EDIT: And coincidentally the one that will send WTG over the edge. lol

Edited by cashfl0w
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If I was Eclipse I would sail the high seas taking booty and plunder from all who fell under my cruel ginger beard

 

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If I was Eclipse I'd kick down the gates of Buckingham palace, bang Kate while high 5ing Prince Philip then kick them all out before declaring myself King of the World.  

 

 

#IfIwasEclipse

Edited by crangs
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If I was Eclipse I'd put Bono, Chris Martin, Bieber, Lil Wayne and Drake in a steel cage, make them fight to the death then feed the winner to my pet grizzly

 

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Gonna go on a HUGE liking spree in this thread.

 

If I was Eclipse I'd get bodied by NoCakeForYaya

 

#whereyouatEclipse

Death wish confirmed.  It'll be a nice funeral, lol

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If I was Eclipse I'd make the GOATest superfight of all time.  Ronda vs Dillishaw, lol :lol:

 

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If I was Eclipse I'd move away from that frozen land of eternal winter, somewhere warm and tropical, near the ocean, where I could spend my days in peace watching the dolphins, maybe even eat a couple of em.

 

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If I was Eclipse I'd have a quiet word with Dana White, bang his wife afterwards and take my spot as the only UFC champ and use all of the other belts for gold teeth.

 

#IfIwasEclipse

Edited by Ozpride
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If i was Eclipse, i'd bring back Pride rules 

 

#IfIwasEclipse

Edited by crangs
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If I was Eclipse I'd take Spiderman off Sony, X-men off 20th Century Fox, give them both back to Marvel and make a proper Avengers series

 

#IfIwasEclipse

Edited by crangs
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If I was Eclipse I would make Mayweather fight Pacquiao and bank all the profits 

 

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If was eclipse I would say that this thread is p5p then bang everyone's girlfriends

 

#IfIWasEclipse

Edited by WarWest
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If I was Eclipse I would pack WarWest's lego in his mad whip and drive that bish back to Canada 

 

#IfIwasEclipse

 

:lol:

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if i was Eclipse this would be my ride

 

mitsubishi-eclipse-04.jpg

That would be a puny Matchbox toy in Eclipse's hand

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If I was Eclipse, I'd find Stan Lee and Jack Kirby, just having a beer or something. I wouldn't say or do anything, just allow them to see me, and decide for themselves that the likeness they created for the incredible Hulk had been wrong all along.

#IfIwasEclipse

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If I was eclipse I would call Nick Diaz a **** and WarWest would like my post

 

#IfIWasEclipse

lol

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If I was Eclipse I'd fly to Australia and dead lift Uluru for ****s n giggles

 

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If I was Eclipse I'd book Diaz vs Condit 2 in an 8'x8' cell

 

#IfIwasEclipse

Edited by crangs
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If I was Eclipse I'd let Chuck Norris walk in on me having a reverse gang bang with all of his female family members. Then I'd **** him too.

 

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If I were Eclipse, I would drive this on the interstate, taking up all the lanes and daring spindly armed fools to road rage at me.

 

biggest-truck.jpg

 

#ifiwasecplipse

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If I was eclipse, I'd fap to Bailey Jay. 

 

#IfIwasEclipse

lol, If you were Sober and Cuban you'd fap to Bailey Jay

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If I was eclipse, I'd fight off all of the UFC champions in the octagon at once and be like, "Okay guys, give me a real challenge."

 

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If I was Eclipse, I would like 700 posts a day, every day, for life. And if you didn't get any likes from me on any of the posts you made that day, then you should cry and then die.

 

#ifiwaseclipse

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