TigerChamp Posted August 21, 2012 Report Share Posted August 21, 2012 so i got a letter in the mail telling me i have to go to jury duty in december. its for supreme court and its expected to last at least 10 days and they arent going to pay me jack crap compared to what i would make from a normal week of work....and quite honestly i dont want to go, i have to go do some stupid test thing in september and im not looking forward to any of this crap im thinking of ways i can get out of this without going to jail. would going in there drunk as **** work? rocking a swastika i drawn on my arms while wearing a white hoodie? im seriously thinking of pulling the religion card. im not religious at all but i think its my only chance. im thinking if i just wear tacky clothes and say im ****ing racist as hell and i hate all ******s jews spics and chugs. maybe that might get me off the hook but i dont want to end up in jail. im thinking the religious bull crap is the best way to go has anybody else had any experience with this? its supreme court and said to last at least 10 days. it must be some serious **** whatever it is but i am not about to put anybody in jail. that is not part of my job description and its against my beliefs. would it help at all if i go in on september and just say that i can tell if a person is guilty just by looking at them? right now im debating pulling the race card or the religion card. i dont even care but there is no way i am going to jury duty during christmas. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shogunrua101 Posted August 21, 2012 Report Share Posted August 21, 2012 One time my mom got a letter for jury duty, she was pregnant at the time so she just wrote that she was pregnant and didnt have to go. hahahaa maybe you can tell them ur pregnant, idk? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
King_Can Posted August 21, 2012 Report Share Posted August 21, 2012 if you admit to being racist you don't have to go. I've never done it but it's 100% true. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
King_Can Posted August 21, 2012 Report Share Posted August 21, 2012 :cool: don't take me up on that though because I don't know exactly how it works try this site http://ca.askmen.com/money/how_to_60/98_how_to.html Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pigs-On-The-Wing Posted August 21, 2012 Report Share Posted August 21, 2012 move out of state. thats how i got out of my jury duty. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jbrahams Posted August 21, 2012 Report Share Posted August 21, 2012 commit a crime :cool: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jduk Posted August 21, 2012 Report Share Posted August 21, 2012 beat up a black kid Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
crangs Posted August 21, 2012 Report Share Posted August 21, 2012 beat up a black kid Write back saying you have a clan meeting that day but if it's any help you'd have said the defendent was guilty anway just for laughs Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
newyorkgiant1 Posted August 21, 2012 Report Share Posted August 21, 2012 Start your reply to every question with..."according to the prophecy" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kevbo_Jones Posted August 21, 2012 Report Share Posted August 21, 2012 Don't shave for a couple of days, get about an hour of sleep the night prior and tell them you just got off of working a graveyard shift. It's worked for me both times I got a summons. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pessimist_Pete Posted August 21, 2012 Report Share Posted August 21, 2012 Just show up wearing pool floaties and flippers. When questioned, start trying to swim through the air. That's what I did. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Enigma_Machine Posted August 21, 2012 Report Share Posted August 21, 2012 Go pick a fight and lose, turn up with a black eye and a busted lip. Take a swig of alcohol, so that your breath smells. Do hard physical exercise for a week beforehand without showering or changing your clothes, including undies. Slowly and rhythmically rock back and forth while scratching your arms claiming your hairs are growing backwards. Refer to yourself in third person at all times, and call yourself "we" at all times. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JBJF Posted August 21, 2012 Report Share Posted August 21, 2012 best way to get out of Jury Duty is to show up... if you don't try to get out of Jury Duty that shows that you may be retarded and court doesn't want retards in the jury... lol... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brewster Posted August 21, 2012 Report Share Posted August 21, 2012 Earlier this year I was a witness in a murder trial, I got out of testifying by having a kidney transplant... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bravo13 Posted August 21, 2012 Report Share Posted August 21, 2012 This may seem like a dumb question, but why do you want to get out of jury duty? I have never been called, and because of my job right now, I can't be called especially for a murder trial. But I always thought it would be interesting to be in a jury. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wirerat Posted August 21, 2012 Report Share Posted August 21, 2012 I got called up 3 different times in my early 20s. First two times I showed up and didn't get selection (Cool!) The 3rd time within the same year I got tired of it and when ia question was asked regarding if I dislike certain groups of people I simply said "If you count the whole of mankind as a group, then the answer is yes. I wish they all were behind bars.". Plain, simple, and to the point (and back then I was honestly still pretty angry with life). I have never been called back since. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NewGuy2000 Posted August 21, 2012 Report Share Posted August 21, 2012 I just received a jury summon yesterday. I filled out the request for disqualification part and sent it out today. I doubt my reason for the request is good enough but it's worth a try. My absence would put my family - especially my daughter in bad shape. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NewGuy2000 Posted August 21, 2012 Report Share Posted August 21, 2012 best way to get out of Jury Duty is to show up... if you don't try to get out of Jury Duty that shows that you may be retarded and court doesn't want retards in the jury... lol... It is the smart ones who know how to get out of jury duty. Unfortunately for our justice system, most jurors tend to be uneducated especially in the field of criminal justice. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pigs-On-The-Wing Posted August 21, 2012 Report Share Posted August 21, 2012 This may seem like a dumb question' date=' but why do you want to get out of jury duty? I have never been called, and because of my job right now, I can't be called especially for a murder trial. But I always thought it would be interesting to be in a jury.[/quote']I think it would be interesting if it was actually a interesting trial, but most are mundane and boring as **** and thats not including the lots f waiting you have to do.....from what i hear anyway. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IM4MMA Posted August 21, 2012 Report Share Posted August 21, 2012 rip up the letter, there is no way of them knowing you received it if it wasnt sent certified mail and u didnt sign for it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pigs-On-The-Wing Posted August 21, 2012 Report Share Posted August 21, 2012 rip up the letter' date=' there is no way of them knowing you received it if it wasnt sent certified mail and u didnt sign for it.[/quote']yup...chance getting arrested. Do that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EdGOAT Posted August 21, 2012 Report Share Posted August 21, 2012 Say you have contagious AIDS Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JBJF Posted August 21, 2012 Report Share Posted August 21, 2012 It is the smart ones who know how to get out of jury duty. Unfortunately for our justice system' date=' most jurors tend to be uneducated especially in the field of criminal justice.[/quote'] well when you think about it.... the jurors are the ones dumb enough to not find a way to get out of it... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EdGOAT Posted August 21, 2012 Report Share Posted August 21, 2012 Say you have AIDS Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
serb-1 Posted August 21, 2012 Report Share Posted August 21, 2012 when you meet your fellow jurors, just say "awful lot of honkies in here..." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Doctor_Obviously Posted August 21, 2012 Report Share Posted August 21, 2012 so i got a letter in the mail telling me i have to go to jury duty in december. its for supreme court and its expected to last at least 10 days and they arent going to pay me jack crap compared to what i would make from a normal week of work....and quite honestly i dont want to go' date=' i have to go do some stupid test thing in september and im not looking forward to any of this crap im thinking of ways i can get out of this without going to jail. would going in there drunk as **** work? rocking a swastika i drawn on my arms while wearing a white hoodie? im seriously thinking of pulling the religion card. im not religious at all but i think its my only chance. im thinking if i just wear tacky clothes and say im ****ing racist as hell and i hate all ******s jews spics and chugs. maybe that might get me off the hook but i dont want to end up in jail. im thinking the religious bull crap is the best way to go has anybody else had any experience with this? its supreme court and said to last at least 10 days. it must be some serious **** whatever it is but i am not about to put anybody in jail. that is not part of my job description and its against my beliefs. would it help at all if i go in on september and just say that i can tell if a person is guilty just by looking at them? right now im debating pulling the race card or the religion card. i dont even care but there is no way i am going to jury duty during christmas.[/quote'] Just go to day 1. When the defendant comes in, say "Yo, (his name), what up homie? Long time no see!"....the judge will instantly kick you out, all while the courtroom is in an uproar due to now having a hung jury because you suddenly "know" the defendant. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JBJF Posted August 21, 2012 Report Share Posted August 21, 2012 Just go to day 1. When the defendant comes in' date=' say "Yo, (his name), what up homie? Long time no see!"....the judge will instantly kick you out, all while the courtroom is in an uproar due to now having a hung jury because you suddenly "know" the defendant.[/quote'] lmao Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
crangs Posted August 21, 2012 Report Share Posted August 21, 2012 Just go to day 1. When the defendant comes in' date=' say "Yo, (his name), what up homie? Long time no see!"....the judge will instantly kick you out, all while the courtroom is in an uproar due to now having a hung jury because you suddenly "know" the defendant.[/quote'] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IM4MMA Posted August 21, 2012 Report Share Posted August 21, 2012 yup...chance getting arrested. Do that. yup, there gonna go through your trash and check your DNA to see if you opened up the mail! they cant prove you received it. good reply though Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pigs-On-The-Wing Posted August 21, 2012 Report Share Posted August 21, 2012 yup' date=' there gonna go through your trash and check your DNA to see if you opened up the mail! they cant prove you received it. good reply though[/quote']if you don't show up...they arrest you. bottom line. they don't care what excuse you have. Its a summons and its no difference than any other summons to court. or at the very least they'll summon you to court anyway to explain why you didn't show up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IM4MMA Posted August 21, 2012 Report Share Posted August 21, 2012 if you don't show up...they arrest you. bottom line. they don't care what excuse you have. Its a summons and its no difference than any other summons to court. or at the very least they'll summon you to court anyway to explain why you didn't show up. all I can say is theres no warrents out for my arrest or anyone elses arrest that has been doing the same thing for the last 15-20 years. Its not an official mail! lets just say yes you are correct, a warrent is issued for your arrest and you stand before the judge. your lawyer is gonna ask, does the DA have any proof that so and so received the letter. the answer will be "no" and case dismissed period! everything has to be proven. if they send it certified mail, yes you better answer it or you will be in trouble Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
classicboxer Posted August 21, 2012 Report Share Posted August 21, 2012 When you get your summons in the mail, write "no longer lives at this address". and send it back. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EdGOAT Posted August 21, 2012 Report Share Posted August 21, 2012 Tell them you have AIDS Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
casino16 Posted August 21, 2012 Report Share Posted August 21, 2012 u can cry in the interview. that works for women, might as well work for a dude. u can also be really biased in the questions they ask. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StompGrind Posted August 22, 2012 Report Share Posted August 22, 2012 This may seem like a dumb question' date=' but why do you want to get out of jury duty? I have never been called, and because of my job right now, I can't be called especially for a murder trial. But I always thought it would be interesting to be in a jury.[/quote'] Some people feel it would be wasting time doing something they don't want to do. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
casino16 Posted August 22, 2012 Report Share Posted August 22, 2012 Some people feel it would be wasting time doing something they don't want to do. also its boring as hell. i went to a trial once having to do with a known gang and the guy was accused of drug running and murder (sounds fun right?) well no it was boring as ****ing hell Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StompGrind Posted August 22, 2012 Report Share Posted August 22, 2012 also its boring as hell. i went to a trial once having to do with a known gang and the guy was accused of drug running and murder (sounds fun right?) well no it was boring as ****ing hell Agreed. As for sneaky ways to get out. Eat alot of beans and broccoli before you go. Im pretty sure they don't want flatulent jurors. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lumpinee_Assasin Posted August 22, 2012 Report Share Posted August 22, 2012 I got out of mine by basically saying I hate cops and don't trust them so the public defender excused me. They question you and give you hypotheticals, say that you've seen cops abuse their power countless times and been a subject of profiling of some sort and when asked if you'd believe an officer over a citizen say you'd rather believe the citizen because cops make mistakes and try to protect their ego. I was the second person excused following questioning lol I was already by the door when the judge called my number. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chanman20 Posted August 22, 2012 Report Share Posted August 22, 2012 ask your boss to call them up and say its a busy time and they need you my dads boss got him out of it twice Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wirerat Posted August 22, 2012 Report Share Posted August 22, 2012 Eat tons of beans and cabbage and don't shower for like a week before you have to report. Something tells me you wouldn't make selection. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TigerChamp Posted August 22, 2012 Author Report Share Posted August 22, 2012 ahaha i like docs idea but they might slap me with contempt for that one. ill show up drunk anyways just for good measure. yeah ill get hosed at 8 am. im pretty much an alcoholic anyways so why not? just go in there reeking of a brewery and wearing tattered up clothes with holes everywhere. chances are they have selected a few hundred people for all i know and ill just answer the questions they give me like a complete idiot. if i end up making the final 12, ill have no faith at all in the justice system at all but i just might grin and bear it. alot of the time when the offender realises the **** just got serious and they are selecting a jury, they will just talk to their lawyer and plead guilty anyways. who knows. im not looking forward to it. but ill do whats in my power to get thrown out of court or not get selected without getting charged for it im not gonna put sideshow bob the psychopath axe murderer in jail and then when he gets out and is walking down the street and passes me by and recognizes my face as one of the guys who helped do him in, its not going to be a "oh hey bob. how ya doing? whats up brother?" kind of deal. plus its boring as hell. the legal system is a whole different language on its own and theres no way i can sit through all of that for 10 days. besides, its up to god, to sit up there in heaven with his purple afro, 4 hands, and 5 feet to make judgements on other people while eating his taco bell. not me. lol i dont think the beans and burritos is that good of an idea. id have to eat alot. i dont really get bad gas from hem i actually enjoy burritos Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wanderleisilva101 Posted August 22, 2012 Report Share Posted August 22, 2012 Just go to day 1. When the defendant comes in' date=' say "Yo, (his name), what up homie? Long time no see!"....the judge will instantly kick you out, all while the courtroom is in an uproar due to now having a hung jury because you suddenly "know" the defendant.[/quote'] Lmfao win! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JHenry Posted August 22, 2012 Report Share Posted August 22, 2012 wear a full aquaman costume, i doubt thatd fail. Or any costume for that matter Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TigerChamp Posted August 23, 2012 Author Report Share Posted August 23, 2012 that would probably get me thrown in the loonie bin Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CyberSlayer Posted August 23, 2012 Report Share Posted August 23, 2012 that would probably get me thrown in the loonie bin Thats how you get out of it.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
crangs Posted August 23, 2012 Report Share Posted August 23, 2012 Turn up in a Cannucks jersey. They'll definitely kick you out for having poor judgement.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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