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Aussie's Invent Poop Powered VW Beetle


HeavyWeightStriker

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The dream of one day butt-blasting what is left of yesterday's flank steak and broccoli florentine into the gas tank of a economy car has come a step closer to reality when Aussie researchers successfully created a Volkswagen Beetle that runs on poop,

 

The company, poopfuel, began researching viable alternative uses for human waste, including urine-based windshield washer fluid and a diaper rash cream made of dandruff and toenail clipping.

 

poopfuel says that poop powered vehicles will solve two problems; creating a sustainable option to oil based fuels, and a sanitary way to deal with biological waste.

 

"The Dung Beetle will come with a padded toilet seat, which'll hook up directly to the gas tank," explained Polly Ester, Director of Ploppers for poopfuel. "Next time you have to drop the kids off at the pool, you grab a section of the Sunday Times and head on out to the garage. Two grunts and ten minutes later, your poop hole is empty, and you got enough gas to pick the kids up at soccer AND get to work the next day.'

 

Makers of the Dung Beetle claim that the raw human excrement that is flushed by way of toilets in just homes, can generate enough power to run the poop car for one year. Researchers expect the car to return 24 MPT (Miles Per Turd) in city driving.

And what about the obvious issues involved with driving a car that burns fanny cookies?

 

"The combustion process is fairly complete," said Skip Roper of the Federal Foundation. "The spent gases are mixed with Renuzit, via a tank mounted in the trunk. Other than the occasional undigested peanut and popcorn kernel skin, the exhaust is remarkably clean."

 

"I mean, it smells like a homeless person's underpants, but it is nearly sterile, biologically."

 

The Dung Beetle will initially be sold only in California, A sporty variant will be available in 2012, with a slightly different fuel requirement:

 

"The sport version will need special fuel," laughed Roper. "You'll need to eat a lot of Power bars and red meat, but the poopfuel GT will hit 60 in 4.8 seconds." :P:p:p

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